Built to Last: Weigh your Words
Ephesians 4:29
Connect:
Share how you have seen God in the Highs and Lows of your week.
Discuss how resolutions made last week in “growing more like Jesus” worked themselves out— what did God do in and through you (Phil 2:13)? Celebrate those together!
Prayer:
Pray that God would lead your discussion time and bring fresh insight, conviction, and hope through your time together.
Read:
Review: Work as group to put together a picture of the series so far:
o Put Jesus’ words into action, building our lives on the firm foundation of His Truth
o Resolving to forgive makes room for God (not Satan) to work in the situation, trusting Him with what needs to be done.
o Weigh your Words!
Read the passage together: Ephesians 4:29
Reflect:
Research tells us that people need 5 words of encouragement to balance out every 1 word of criticism— why might that be so? Explain.
Discuss the phrase, “Let no unwholesome words come out of your mouths”
o Whose responsibility is it to guard our words? (Eph 4:29, James 3:1-12, Prov 29:20, Matt 12:37, Matt 15:18)
o Discuss and explain WHY “meeting unwholesome talk with unwholesome talk” creates a very different family than one that is seasoned (Col 4:6), controlled (James 1:26), and intended for blessing (1 Peter 3:9). How does that work?
Eph 4:29 talks about “building others up according to the need of the moment.” That’s going to be tough sometimes because hurting people tend to hurt people around them!
o How do we maintain the ability to discern the “need of the moment” when someone is hurting (thus potentially being hurtful to others)? (I John 4:19, John 15:1-12, I Cor 13)
o If the purpose is “to build others up”, when the “need of the moment” is a word of correction/exhortation, is it best to just not speak? Explain. (Col 3:8, Gal 6:1-5, Prov 3:11-12, Ps 94:12)
Scott talked about our words of “Charis” (encouragement, benefit) as being a “Gift”. How does this term and its original meaning help us to understand aspects of this choice we are making when “weighing our words”?
o If responding with grace costs us something, what might that cost be?
o Why would it still be worth that cost? (Prov 16:24, Matt 12:36-37)
o How has the grace of others been healing in your own life through encouragement/ blessing when you did not feel you deserved it?
Respond: (Divide the group into pairs)
o If we need a 5 to 1 ratio of encouragement to criticism, that might require a RADICAL change in the way we relate to others! Start modelling that discipline right now in your Life Group by expressing
“The best part about being with you all right now is…” and
“Where I need “building up” right now is…”
Close in prayer in pairs, sharing prayer requests/ praises and affirming each other “according to the need of the moment”
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